November 3rd, 2007



I'm really scraping here. Just swirling water in a shallow pan, and trying not to lose whatever I might have. I figure, if something's there and I just keep turning it all over, maybe it will come to the top. Maybe.

I don't see her, but maybe I'm inadvertently looking for dysfunctional gold.

I have been really lost when it comes to relationships. Big news, eh? But, this time I'm not embroiled in anything, just confused by the ones I have that haven't really been made very clear, for lots of different reasons.

I mean, I haven't found anything that seems to fit my expectations and is also reciprocated. Much staggering and crashing to the pavement, nose scrapings to accent my ugly face. I'm not satisfied, and I'm starting to think I never will be.

Perhaps my ego is greater than the sum of the squares of two sides of a right triangle.